Remember how great thou art

Here is Jochen’s comment on the Heavenletter Spiritual Community Forum in response to Heavenletter™ #2761, Be Your Own Prince http://www.heavenletters.org/be-your-own-prince.html

“It seems to me that if you had friends who were the way you see yourself, you would stay away from them.”

Very funny but, alas, true. No, wait. Regrettably still true, but regarding it from this angle, it starts looking like a solvable problem. Dear God, help us laugh our way out of this.

Be sure you read to the end of this entry.

To Jochen’s open, honest response on the forum, I wrote:

Just last night, someone in town whom I know called and had to tell me how horrible she is, and hopeless, and terrible. Those were her words. She quoted from saints who said you had to do this or be this before God would bless you etc. She made a great (mistaken) case for staying stuck where she was. Other people might improve, but she never could because she was so terrible etc. I don’t know what’s terrible about her except how she talks about herself.

She doesn’t read Heavenletters. She has a computer and doesn’t hook it up because what’s the point. She can’t go to the library to use the computer there because she has no energy.

And then this Heavenletter, Be Your Own Prince, popped up this morning! But, according to this lady’s perception, she is a lost cause and, therefore, I suppose she will never read it anyway.

If she would read the comments on the forum alone, she would begin to see in a new light. If she could read even one of your expansive comments, Jochen, she would get out of where she makes herself stay.

But who am I to talk! I remember how astonished I was one day when I called myself Honey!

Mary Sunshine wrote and got a rise out me:

Dearest Gloria and Jochen - I used to try to fix everyone and as a result, I burned out….but here’s the thing…as beloved Bernie has told me and countless others…you give someone the gift…be it one of his books, or a Heaven Letter (via snail mail) and then they get to choose what to do with it.When the pupil is ready, the teacher appears so perhaps dear Gloria, you might want to print it out and just give it to her…and God will do the rest if she allows God to….
Blessings to you both and all here in Heaven.

I wrote:

You bring up some interesting points, and some strong feelings in me. I know about burn-out.

With all due respect, over the years I have given attention to this dear lady. I spent half an hour on the phone with her last night. I firmly believe it is for her to take initiative. I am not her mother. I am not her social worker. I am not an intercessor between her and God. I am not going out of my way to do one more thing for her. I don’t want to, and I also feel that it is better for her that I don’t. Do I sound hard-hearted?

She has made certain choices. She can change them today. If she asks me for something (other than to listen to her self-recriminations), that’s different.

Her theme seems to be how awful she is. When I went through my hard times, I wasn’t all that different from this lady. Except my theme was more how good I am, and how badly the world is treating me.

Jochen, what is the fairly recent Heavenletter about not feeling sorry for anyone?

Of course, Jochen found it: http://www.heavenletters.org/don’t-feel-sorry-for-anyone.html

Jim wrote in response to Be Your Own Prince:

How to befriend myself? I know that this is important…but how to do it? Hmm…Maybe, just maybe to see myself through the eyes of the Father…through the eyes of God.

Okay…I’m with you so far. How in the world does God see me?

Well…God sees you as his special, precious child…wrapped in His arms…resting in His Heart. You are never apart from God…you are a part of God. Your living, breathing essence is of the Father…is the Father…and as such…you are living Love.

That sounds so loving and beautiful…but for the most part, throughout my days, I get so lost in thought and judgement, that it is hard to see myself other than a person struggling with this and that. Do you know what I mean?
Yes… I do know what you mean beloved. I do indeed.

And yet…begin…again and again…if you will…to see yourself through the patient, loving and caressing eyes of your Father. You, beloved, have never done anything wrong….and do not deserve the judgement and the harshness that you bring to yourself. Set this judgement softly aside and look anew at yourself…Look at yourself with Divine eyes…Eyes that do not carry the veils of the world in their lens…Eyes that are crystal clear and clean…and see only the Christ-like Divinity…the Love that you are.

This is a soft invitation from me to you…from Jim to you…to see yourself differently. So…whenever you start getting down on yourself, take off your human spectacles…and see anew…through Divine eyes…see into your heart…see your innocence, your wonder…your beauty…and your love. See yourself for who you truly are…a beautiful, loving child of God. Behold! the wonder of You!

Berit wrote:

How wonderful this Heavenletter and how wonderful the postings, how interesting this story, or better this Lady. Indeed I think the first step towards a change, any change, should come from her, otherwise, you could go on endless hours on trying to convince her that she isn’t at all terrible without any result, because in fact, she seems pretty determined to be in that role now. Again we are talking about roles, interesting.

I think printing a Heavenletter, with all replies and just give it to her might be a good chance for her. I suppose something will change when she tired enough of what she’s playing out now or when other events might occur. It is about healing, a deep inner healing. We should allow others to be whatever they choose to be of course, even if it’s natural to want to help them to see things from a different point of view. Much love and thanks to all.

And, finally, Janice M. wrote:

A great reminder that we should love and bless ourselves. Remember how great thou art.

I love that line: Remember how great thou art.

The forum is a wonderful place.

I learned a lot from all the comments, and I came to some realizations:

I’m pretty sure I have spent much of my life bending over backwards to fix people according to my ideals. My picture (my role) of being the fixer used to be paramount. Now I discover it isn’t any more. In fact, I am feeling strongly that it is not my place at all. Why have I assumed that that my friend must change? She may be perfectly happy in her unhappiness. In any case, it is her choice, not mine. Is it possible that I am learning to let go?

Just this morning, as I am putting this entry together, I received a newsletter from my friend and Heavenreader, Jeff Keller http://www.YourSpiritualJourney.net The title of Jeff’s newsletter today was Why Aren’t They Dancing? That title says a lot. Where do we get the idea at a party that everyone has to dance?

Where do we get the idea that anyone has to be other than she or he is? Who do I think I am that I can improve someone?

I do not think there is one thing I can do for this lady that would make a whit of difference to her. I’ve printed out Heavenletters for her in the past, etc. Maybe this lady who has a low opinion of herself wasn’t asking me for guidance . Maybe she doesn’t think she has to change either.

In case it wasn’t clear, I want to say I am fond of this lady who called me on the phone. I was glad to hear from her. I am always glad to hear from her or to bump into her in town. I LIKE her. She is a kind of a will o’ the wisp. She’s someone you can only be gentle with.

And yet I have a confession to make. I find myself angry, and I’m not quite sure why.

On the phone, when my friend kept quoting all the statements that she’s read that saints have made about all you have to be or do before you can receive God’s love, I actually swore. I never swear. I can’t believe I did, but I did, not at this lady, but, um, at the saints! Several times during the conversation I said: “Screw the saints! Screw the saints!”

Am I really so angry at the saints, whoever they were, for writing what they believed was true? I ask myself, Is my anger directed at my friend, after all, for taking everything she reads that supports her poor opinion of herself as gospel?

Am I feeling vehement because I have not expressed or asserted myself enough in the past? Or do I feel vehement because of all the overdoing of helping others in the past that I have done that didn’t bear fruit? Or am I vehement because all my attempted helping was not really altruistic but a way to feel needed and so to puff up my ego?

Anyway, this is all the past, and I think I will now forget about it and go pick some flowers.

Posted by Gloria on June 17th, 2008 under these topics
Personal Development, Heaven Letters, Godwriting Journal

Add your comment

Top

Post Discussion

13 Replies

Reply from Joyce on June 17, 2008

Here’s something you might try. Ask Friend, “Do you suppose we draw closer to God when we are loving, or when we are punishing?” Friend: “When we are loving.” You: “Then why punish yourself? Why not find something you love, and stick with that?”

Reply from Jack van Raders on June 17, 2008

Jochen, How are the flowers???

Who are the Saints?? did they say whatever your lady friend read or is it a book written by a religion who tells the reader what a Saint has said, I remember my cousin who went to confession because she enjoyed sex with her husband. How sick are some teachings. I have many times told people to stop putting them selves down, as they are putting me down as well because I am in their company. That normally gives them some thing to think about. I get quit often the complement of how wonderful I am and how wonderful my family is. Yes I agree with the family bit but I am your friend am I not so if you were so bad would I seek your company???? So where is the problem??? Love to you ALL Jack

Reply from Jochen Lehner on June 17, 2008

” I have many times told people to stop putting them selves down, as they are putting me down as well because I am in their company.”

This is Jack at his very, very best! My mouth just dropped open, I must have looked quite stupid, you would have enjoyed the sight. Tell me, where do you get those unbelievably simple solutions? They just bubble up from your big soft loving heart, right?

Perhaps these simple and most powerfully effective things don’t occur to me (and some others, even saints among them…..) because there is so much investment in having to be right. All the pressure, suffered and inflicted……

Yes, let’s go pick some flowers (or Jack Fruit) together.

Reply from Charles Fines on June 17, 2008

“Screw the saints!” That’s pretty amusing, Gloria. This woman sounds like an energy vampire. Are you worn out after spending time with her? Some people get thru life by sucking the life energy out of other people who may not even be aware that it is happening.

I suppose God might have handled this with a little more patience and decorum but I think you did about right. Some people seem to need being yelled at to wake up and smell the coffee, and some people even that doesn’t work. Some people you just need to walk away from and shake the dust off of your sandals.

Reply from Gloria on June 17, 2008

Beloved Charles and All,

I know what it is to be drained, but I don’t feel that at all from this lady. Maybe because I just don’t take her all that seriously and because — I don’t know what makes it so — I feel free to be impatient with her and say, “Screw the saints!” Who would have thought I could ever do that.

A letter arrived from this lady today, very sweet. I’ll quote some of it. I think you will pick up how truly lovely she is too:

“Dear Gloria, how sweet of you to take the time to help me and how very insightful you are. You certainly have God working for and through you. How extremely fortunate. I am thrilled to hear that your book is published in different countries and you went there. How fabulous!!! We are all so proud of you.”

You don’t feel heaviness from her, do you?

Then she gave me a few quotes that I could choke on, followed by some very beautiful ones that I feel aligned with. But first the ones I can’t take to heart:

“A woman of the best type is convinced in her heart of hearts that she cannot even dream in this world of a man other than her lord.”

Well, folks, I’ve got to tell you that’s not me. And I can’t possibly imagine God’s saying a woman of the “best type” any more than I can imagine God’s saying a woman of the “worst type.”

Here’s another I don’t favor. Forgive me, who am I to spurn what someone else believes in: “Devotion of body, speech and mind to her lord’s feet is the only duty, sacred vow and penance of a woman.” Duty, vow, penance? Love I am happy to give to God. I can’t help it anyway. But not duty, not vow, and not penance. I won’t.

But two I really like are:

“Without love, there is no true exchange.”

“The one true religion of all souls is love, and that religion is one without a second.”

Please note this lady wrote to say thank you. God bless her.

I love everyone’s comments. I know I am in the company of the wise. I wouldn’t be surprised to discover that I am in the company of true saints.

Reply from Jochen Lehner on June 18, 2008

Sorry, no “true exchange” without love of self.
No “one true religion of all souls” as long as we allow ourselves to be held hostage by saints.

I just found another great “trick” that could be Jack’s invention but actually is from Heaven #2244, HOW TO BE A BLESSING:

“What if you sat across from yourself? What would you want you to know and hear about?”

Reply from Gloria on June 18, 2008

Now I feel that if I would think before I speak, I would have extolled saints and questioned only what some sometimes say. Are we not told to go by what people do and not what they say? I do feel sorry for what I have been saying. Have I not been in judgment?

I guess what I really most mean to say is not to always take what someone else has said as a total guideline for our own lives.

There was a time when duty, vows, and penance perhaps had a different connotation that they do now. Maybe the words were mis-translated. Maybe duty meant honor, and not drudgery as I think of duty.

I could say that Godwriting is my duty. It is my pleasure. It is a gift from God. It is my privilege. It is my choice to do every morning, and yet I feel compelled to do it.

I suppose a husband who works hard to support his family is doing his duty, and yet it is his love for his family that motivates him so he is, in actuality, doing what he wants to do.

I feel like I have had some axe to grind, and, therefore, an ego need to go on a tirade. Good grief, I have the nerve to take on saints — what was I thinking of. I don’t like the word repent, but it seems I do repent. I believe God has said repenting is seeing something in a different way, and I do, I do.

Reply from Jochen Lehner on June 18, 2008

That’s strange, I took it for granted from the beginning that you (and everyone else) “questioned only what some sometimes say”. I find myself questioning more and more of what has been said by people, including contemporaries, who are called saints. If I find something is misleading or potentially misleading or simply not applicable any more, what’s wrong with saying so? God, in Heavenletters, states in no uncertain terms that He is NOT the way God is depicted in some places in the Old Testament, and isn’t it a great and wonderful thing that error or distortion can be simply called error and distortion today? Yes, we may tend to get unduly personal, even to the point of temporarily judging someone. But then we notice that and simply say “Sorry”, acknowledging our - and everyone’s - humanness that is so prone to error, distortion and judgement. Does that include revocation of the insights life has made available to us?

Another point of view: Years ago, someone I knew took his life after many years of intense spiritual practice. Everyone wondered why nobody had tried to stop him, everyone agreed that he should have had therapy instead of endless dogged meditation that was obviously toxic for him. What is a blessing for someone can be poisonous for someone else. The words of saints can be infinitely beneficial for someone who absorbs them, resonates with them, loves them and metabolizes them into new life; and they can be a curse for someone else who just tries to hide from life behind those very same words. And in the latter case, some frustration, even if unjustified in the final analysis, is all too understandable.

Reply from Charles Fines on June 18, 2008

Yes, Gloria, it sounds as if the woman is sincere, if perhaps stuck in the past, and that it was worth you spending the time with her. People grow at different rates and in different ways and it’s difficult to remember that sometimes.

I’ve been exasperated a lot lately so I guess I enjoyed your exasperation with this woman. I suppose just as we all respond to different religious traditions and have different friends, we would naturally be in tune with different saints as well.

Actually I think the original word that gets translated as “saints” meant something more like all of us who seek God as our Father. Probably even that would be too narrow a definition for some. I guess I’ll just say to the woman and whoever else is listening, whatever floats your boat!

Reply from Jo on June 26, 2008

The alignments and synchronicities within this blog sometimes totally blow my mind. I’ve been reading the posts out of order and the simple yet profound message of “Beyond Words” resonates with much of what is being said here for this post. Jochen, your words about words are brilliant and compassionate. We each have our own unique personal responses to words. One line in a novel or a song may pierce me through the heart and yet not even elicit notice from another person. We each hear (experience) the voice of God differently. This is both wonderfully amazing and terribly challenging when it comes to living as a human Being!

Reply from Gloria on June 27, 2008

Isn’t it amazing, Jo?

I remember going to a movie with a friend. I thought it was beautiful. She thought it was awful! I couldn’t understand how this could be. I think we both thought the other person was nuts!

When it comes to the two movies that had such a powerful affect on me — Jesus Christ Superstar and GODSPELL, I do easily understand how they do not affect others the way they affected me. I wonder why this is.

Reply from Jo on June 27, 2008

I think it’s because of the plethora of lesson opportunities presented by these differences in our perceptions. Just understanding that no two people ever perceive the same experience in the same way is an enormous lesson! Our incredible uniqueness also helps us appreciate how truly beautiful and extraordinary we are as Beings.

Reply from Gloria on June 27, 2008

Even twins are different people!

And then sometimes strangers are very much alike!

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI