I find reading over those early very personal 1999 Heavenletters™ that Annette, Heaven’s archivist, has asked me to give titles to, kinda emotional.

My relationship with God then was so very personal. In my current personal Godwriting™ (as opposed to numbered Heavenletters), God and I are not quite so chummy. Back then I was more of a Chatty Kathy, going on about details of my life, as if God were sitting right there with me, having nothing better to do than to listen to what I would go on and on about, things like who said what and what I said and my hair and other such things that now I simply wouldn’t think of talking to God about. Back then, I really told God EVERYTHING.

I have never understood the concept of an impersonal God, and I don’t believe I have ever wanted an impersonal relationship ever with anyone.

As I read over early-on Godwriting, I see the contrast between personal Godwriting then and my current personal Godwriting. It is not so much the Godwriting I am really talking about. It’s what I write down, not God. It’s not God Who is changed. I’m changed, and what I talk to God about is changed. These days I don’t want to babble about my personal life, and I seem incapable of doing so. I give God other things to respond to, much less personal things. God responds to what I give him to respond to.

I do check in with God just from myself every morning, and yet, it seems to be more of a formality, and sometimes I resist, like maybe it isn’t necessary, yet God seems to want me to continue checking in with Him. I mean, He has told me to do this everyday.

It looks like my personal life is kinda fading away. It certainly isn’t all that important any longer. At least, my personal life isn’t THE most important thing as it was back then. Anyway, now my personal life is Heavenletters. It’s Heavenletters I am immersed in. Now I am eager to get to writing down the real Heavenletter itself where God initiates the topic, and I don’t even know what it’s going to be about.

It’s not God and I passing the time any longer. Somehow I have turned into God’s servant, and there is nothing much to talk to God about except Himself and Heavenletters.

However, this morning in my personal Godwriting, I did tell God how nostalgic I felt for those early days of such sweet simple innocent personal closeness with Him when He and I were more like, well, buddies, and the personal aspect was IT.

Now I sense that there is neither personal nor impersonal God anymore, simply God.

This morning God said that the word impersonal isn’t the right word anyway. God substituted the word universal. Not Impersonal God but Universal God. I like that much better.

As God often does, He pointed out the ideal models who once walked the Earth. God said:

“Gloria, Christ and I did not chit-chat. The love was greater, not less. It never was about Christ, and it’s not about you.�

It must be I’m supposed to grow up.