As Jochen implies, God as father is just a metaphor and metaphors often carries baggage that can cause us problems. I will try to explain my thinking, hoping it will be helpful and constructive to this conversation.

First, what I see as the usefulness of the metaphor: the good stuff. God, in some ways, is very much like a parent to us. We are created in His image in much the same way our physical body is created in our earthly parents’ image through their genes. The image in which God created us, of course, is not a physical image, it is the image of love that we are created out of. The metaphor also speaks of God as personal and concerned and supportive in the same way as a human parent is present and engaged with his or her child (when that parent has a healthy personality). Our God is no impersonal, unfeeling Being. God is hugely involved with us. I suspect this is why Jesus loved this metaphor and used it so well.

But every metaphor has its limitations and the limitations can cause problems for us that may be hidden behind the usefulness of the metaphor. The metaphor seems to say that God is male and this is a stumbling block for some. God, of course, is not male nor female nor neutral, none of these material categories apply in the least. The biggest limitation, as I see it though, is what Jochen and Charles have implied: the way our experience with our earthly fathers can be a huge, almost invisible obstacle for us. Many of us carry emotional scars from our earthly parents. I know I do. My father loved and was devoted to all his children but he was not able to express his feelings directly, seeming cold and distant I now realize I spent a good portion of my early life feeling rejected by my father. I really do think these kinds of concepts kind of bleed through each other in our minds. It is helpful to me to be writing this down. It feels like an “aha!” and I feel lighter and freer as I type this. It feels good to type that my emotional rejection by my earthly father has absolutely nothing to do with how God feels about me.

I do love you, Father, and I am so fortunate to be your child!

Love and hugs to all.

My father was greatly admired and respected by those outside his family, even loved by some. The thought of possibly having to interact with him on the other side gives me the same knot in my stomach that it did here while he was still alive. All I can come up with is that I think he did the best he could with what he was given, God bless him. I would hope my daughter could say that about me some day. This all has made the concept of God as Father more difficult than it should be, but not impossible.

Blowing up those dams leaves a lot of debris piled up in the river which could take a very long time to wear down or away. Maybe not impervious to a miracle to shorten that time, but I suspect increasing the flow of love out of my heart would be more in order. Maybe blowing up those dams is a miracle in itself. I seem to have a lot of trouble catching up.

When I used to make my living planting small seedling trees by the hundreds, occasionally a joke would be played on someone by slipping a fist-sized rock or two into the bag of trees they carried which ideally would not be discovered until the bag was near empty. Not my idea of a good joke, but it did teach me to check my bag for rocks. Probably should still be doing that more often.

Reading this message a second and third time, the feeling is of coming dangerously close to the heart of the matter which is love of God. It’s easy to appreciate and admire the Creator for His great handiwork and to love it. But what makes me want to bury my face in my hands, what makes me want to disappear at the words “I love You, God”? If I can feel the truth of those words, and I can, what makes me fear them so?

Something about father, I guess. At least in my case. Something about love not acceptded, not wanted, about deepest shame at your most precious and innocent gift unexplainably rejected. In a culture that addresses God as male, it’s only natural that your father image gets projected onto your God image. How to remove that projection? How to undo the belief that when you love your father or Father, your very existence will be negated?

What makes me address this issue is the stunning realization that fear of love, of love for Father, blithely survives all the evolutionary steps I imagine I have taken.

Well, at least I can see it now with some clarity. And perhaps there is some “It is done” for everyone.